Today’s article is somewhat a controversial kind of thinking. It would not go well with everyone. Is probably never ideal to try making a list. However, this is not list making but listing an attribute where it already exist. Or probably, describing a kings wify like with Solomon in proverb 31. So enjoy reading and let me know if you want to add or remove from the list.
So, the following could define her
- She has given her life to Christ (this is enough if you care).
- Like Abigail, she is a woman of good understanding, and of a beautiful countenance (1 Samuel 25:3). Beauty is important as it suits you so you will not be open for a spoil whatsoever.
- she is virtuous (proverb 31).
- She is a jewel of inestimable. More than the proverb 31 woman, especially- She is far more precious than jewels. She seeks wool and flax and works with willing hands. She is like the ships of the merchant; she brings her food from afar. She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue… Proverbs 31:10-31
- Strength and dignity are her clothing; she smiles at the future (Proverbs 31:25).
- She has the fear of God (demonstrable). Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised- Proverbs 31:30.
- She is a woman of faith. Faith and trust in God (2 Timothy 1:5).
- She is modest and beautiful in her outlook, adorns herself in respectable apparel, and with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works (1 Timothy 2:9-15).
- She is teachable and can listen.
- She is humble, self-controlled, and respectful.
- As the wife of a bishop-She is well behaved, sober, and honest (1 Timothy 3:11).
- She lightens her environment with her smile. She has a joyful heart with a cheerful face (Proverbs 15:13).
- She is peaceable with others and not a person of high look-proud or high expectation. Like in Rom 12:16: “she Lives in harmony with others. She is not too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And she doesn’t think she knows it all!” But her expectation is like those who trust in the Lord and live in the fear of the Lord. “My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him” (Psalm 62:5, KJV) “There is surely a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off.” (Proverbs 23:18).
- Someone who has passed through a verifiable process of making and discipleship. Who have learned how to handle people. How to be lead and how to lead. We all have different nurture and up-bring. We have a better chance and compatibility if we have passed through a common process of making and values.
- She should be of good report and reputation, and from a family of brethren. In Genesis 24, Abraham tells his servant to go back to his homeland and find a wife for Isaac from Abraham’s country and Abraham’s relatives. And in 2 Corinthians 6:14, Paul admonished- Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? Compatibility is paramount too. There is beyond being a fellow believer or being good. I believe that two good people must not necessarily mean they would be good together. There has to be a step-up check on compatibility.
- She is spirit-filled and with a contrite heart. The Spirit-filled life is the life of the Lord Jesus reproduced in us by the Holy Spirit. Is a life of calm, composure, and quiet confidence (Isaiah 30:15). Besides, everybody has a good and flawed part. However, this does not mean a state of perfection. As 1 John 1:8,10 declares- if we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves… but someone who the Holy Spirit can convince, The Holy Spirit can prick her heart and can give her witness. So you can be sure that you can pray to God to help you convince her. Besides, no one can be 100%, but you should be sure that your love can cover for the gaps: once the basic safe-nets of salvation, spirit-filled and godliness is in place.
- She is capable of lightening the home with her Joy and love. Such Joy can drive the man and the home to great heights and glory. Proverbs 5:18-19 captures this: “So be happy with your wife and find your joy with the woman you married – pretty and graceful as a deer. Let her charms keep you happy; let her surround you with her love.
The biblical mandate to husbands and wives is to seek your own joy in the joy of the other (Ephesians 5:25–30). Husbands are told to love their wives the way Christ loved the church. How did He love the church? Verse 25 says He “gave Himself up for her.” But why? Verse 26 says, “that He might sanctify” and cleanse her. But why did He want to do that? Verse 27 answers, “that He might present the church to himself in splendor!” “For the joy that was set before Him [He] endured the cross” (Hebrews 12:2). What joy? The joy of marriage to His bride, the church. The joy of presenting the church to himself in blood-bought splendor.
When you love the person with whom God has made you one flesh, you are loving yourself. That is, your greatest joy is found in seeking the greatest joy of the other. So, a wify material is someone you can love till eternity. No managing, no pitying, not a decision to impress anybody, but your singular thought-out decision.
These are not making of rules, please! On a normal day, what you sow is what you reap, you get what you put in: input=output,… If you sow love, you reap love. If you treat her like a queen, you get a queen. If you treat her anyhow, you get anyhow.
Well, in all your getting, get you a bundle of JOY! A king’s bride!