Technology in education
Technology in education
Continuing with the series on covenant relationship, the friendship of David and Jonathan highlights enormously the terms that compose the content of what constitutes covenant relationship. There would be no where in the church where the subject of friendship is being discussed that references would not be made to David and Jonathan’s. There doesn’t seem to be a godlier example of friendship in the Bible.
The definition of Covenant relationships was portrayed in the lines of thier relationship. We see in 1 Samuel 20:14–17, 42; Jonathan and David made a covenant of friendship and peace that was to last through their descendants forever. So we can attempt to define covenant from here as a solemn promise between two or more people. Not like the binding agreements in legal sense. A covenant is so much more than a contract. Covenant is rooted in promise and relationship. It implies a bond that cannot be easily broken by situations. Bearing in mind that these covenants remains unwritten, the definitions we give to our relationships are the covenant binding us in those relationships.
And it came to pass, when he had made an end of speaking unto Saul, that the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul. Then Jonathan and David made a covenant, because he loved him as his own soul. And Jonathan stripped himself of the robe that was upon him, and gave it to David, and his garments, even to his sword, and to his bow, and to his girdle. 1 Samuel 18:1-4.
The words used to describe their relationship in the verses above suggests a strong bond between them. He says their souls were “knit” together and that Jonathan loved David “as his own soul. Then Jonathan made a covenant with David and demonstrated the reality of his promise by giving his robe, armor, and weapons to David. Thus began one of the greatest friendships described in the Bible.
Friendship is important to people of faith. If we choose friends wisely and become a supportive, loyal friend, we can strengthen our faith during these unloving times. (Proverbs 27:17) So let us see what virtues we can learn about covenant relationship from David and Jonathan’s;
Its common in Christian relationship for one (especially guys) to blush and crush at the other in the private. Especially; through calls, chats and messages. Sometimes, including when they hangout alone.
But when they are in the presence of igwemmadu(other brethren),they tend to act like they never knew the other nor have any interest to do so, sometimes even avoiding them in the public.
These attitudes is very wrong.
Friendship exist when two or more persons acknowledges a sense of (mutual) relevance and developed a sincere respect for (each of) the other.
Identifying with your friends in the public shows you are proud of them as well as the relationship. True friends should have a sense of mutual privilege to be with each other anywhere.
The contrary could have a lot of interpretation; like you are trying not to give other friends the impression that this is your favourite. Or your friend is not good enough…
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SOME TIMES GOD BRINGS IN SOME PEOPLE TO SHOW US A GLIMPS OF WHAT HE HAS IN HIS WILL FOR US.
Most of these times we clung to those people like ‘if is not this one no other’.
BUT GOD KEEPS SAYING—WAIT FOR MY PERFECT WILL.
ALL THE WONDERFUL FRIENDS GOD HAS ALLOWED TO COME YOUR WAY
ARE THE DESCRIPTIONS OF WHAT HE HAS IN HIS WILL FOR YOU.
God will not give something less
BECAUSE HE DOES NOT ENTICE HIS PEOPLE
WITH SOMETHING THEY CAN NOT HAVE.
Then the king made Daniel a great man, and gave him many great gifts, and made him ruler over the whole province of Babylon, and chief of the governors over all the wise men of Babylon. Then Daniel requested of the king, and he set Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, over the affairs of the province of Babylon: but Daniel sat in the gate of the king.
Selflessness is the solution to every challenges we can name in our relationships. The case of Daniel, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego is another biblical examples of Covenant relationships that is completely Divine. Theirs is a highlight of Proverbs 18:24 ‘a friend who sticks closer than a brother’. The Divine factor in their relationship is most overwhelming in the various ways God used them to show King Nebuchadnezzar and the entire Babylonians that God is great and the only God.
Unlike Abram and Lot whose relationship was being negatively threatened by strife and competition, the relationship between Daniel and his friends was rather threatened positively by a change in status; promotion. Like the Bible described promotion in Proverbs 19:4, 6-7
“Wealth brings many friends, but a poor man is deserted by his friend. Many curry favor of an official; everyone is a friend of the gift giver. All the relatives of a poor person shun him—how much more do his friends avoid him! Though he runs after them pleading, they aren’t around”.
Promotion brings many new friends and creates a wall against the old friends. This is probably because people like to show off their new status and most times they do this by parading with the people in their new status to show that they too have arrived.
The importance of Covenant relationships as enlisted in my previous article (https://christsmindtech.wordpress.com/2018/12/31/covenant-friends-a-prerequisite-for-living-life-by-design/?preview=true) is much to be esteemed than the pleasure in new flashy friends. In the case of Daniel and his friends, their continued relationship remained a threat to the kingdom of darkness prevailing over Babylon.
To make a relationship work in circumstances like this requires that one shew himself friendly by looking out for one another and stick to being a friend sometimes by taking cautious measures to keep the relationship working. Like Daniel did when he requested that Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego be promoted to high positions. At Daniel’s request, the king appointed Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego to be in charge of all the affairs of the province of Babylon, while Daniel remained in the king’s court.
We have a lot to learn on covenant relationship from this singular act of Daniel;
1. Many persons talk about defining a relationship: we may consider defining our next relationships as a covenant relationship. Are there persons that gives you a synergistic capabilities to do the impossible? ( the one shall chase a thousandth and two ten thousandth principle). We need to define them, define the areas of this capacity and consciously stick to them.
2. Purpose thrives effortlessly in partnership. By doing your part and having others do theirs, the goal is achieved effortlessly. This principle (the partnership principle) is highlighted in the purpose for which God tasked Elijah to anoint Elisha, Jehu and Hazael all to one goal (1king 19:15_17): watch what God said in verse 17: “And it shall come to pass, that him that escapeth the sword of Hazael shall Jehu slay: and him that escapeth from the sword of Jehu shall Elisha slay”.
We need partners who fights with us in every course of life. Fighting in prayers, in wisdom, in counsel and in action. Remember, “Two is better than one…and…a triple-braided cord is not easily broken”(Eccl4:9-12).
3. We need to define a set of friends we could comfortably account to (the accountability principle). Many a times we enter into mistakes when we adopt ‘mind my business’ approach to life hurdles.
For instance, decisions like dropping out of school though not always a foolish decision, but if we are able to open up to friends we get better convictions that we are rightly led. Most of our secret decisions are full of risks and dead ends. I know, no one will successfully commit suicide if he/she opens up to a friend!
Do not keep your secret decisions to yourself; make friends who are accountable, who you could share counsel with.
Daniel was the wisest man in the empire, but he still needed his covenant friends to lend their might to his assignment !
GRACE TO YOU!
Learning from Biblical examples
Friendship, if chosen right, can be a great source of love, healing, joy, knowledge, mentorship, influence, companionship, partnership, motivation, encouragement etc.
There are a number of friendship relationship in the Bible that teaches us how we should relate with one another on daily basis. From Old Testament relationships to that in the New Testament epistles, we look into these examples in the Bible to gain understanding in the leading of our own relationship lives.
Some of such divine relationship as recorded in the bible includes;
Abraham and Lot
Abraham is Lot’s uncle. Terah, who is Abraham’s father and grand-father to Lot was the one who started the journey to Cannan taking Abram his son, Lot the son of Haran his late son, and Sarai his: Abram’s wife (Gen 11:31;12:4-5). After Terah died, Abram became the limelight and continued to lead the journey.
These singular act of Abraham highlights the need for continuity in relationship, not like our present day experience of old-friends-turn-bad and incessant urge for new friend. With every new environment, we tend towards a new friends surge. The friends from old environment get forgotten. The BIBLE teaches longevity of relationship as we could also see in Proverbs 27:10; ‘Thine own friend, and thy father’s friend, forsake not; …’
Many factors threaten our relationship. Changing circumstances like promotion, demotion, success, failure, new friends, end of a program or an assignment , marriage etc. Though relationships are with their distinct purposes; it does not mean that these relationships should go when the purposes are no more. Such purposes like school mates, colleagues, holiday acquaintances etc. The ability to keep tracks of our relationships makes us disciplined and imbued with the ability to identify with various human differences, such virtues necessary for a good interpersonal relationship.
There is a saying that some people come into your life for a season, and some for a reason. We should not confuse the two. This is not about having many friends for popularity or to being blessed with people. Quality is still more important than quantity when it comes to friendship. However, relating this to present day relationship, this highlights the importance of mutual responsibility of the parties involved in a relationship towards sustaining such relationship. This is more often a case in opposite sex relationship where the customs beliefs system assumes that the ladies has no role to play in making a relationship work. But we well know that we could all help make friendship work. Especially covenant friends; those who have come to stay.
The only problem in friendship ( I think) is the ‘marriage assumption syndrome’; relationship counselors spend most times on marriage matters forgetting that marriage is only an end, the process to it is the relationship cadres. A healthy relationship breeds a healthy marriage experience. Second problem in friendship is a lack of proper definition of our relationships: lack of proper communications and many assumptions.
If these assumption can be well communicated and ruled out, then anyone can contribute to making a friendship work. There should be people we don’t give up on (Even after marriage, there are friends that would and should still remain).
When it seems some friends are gone. The truth is sometimes we are the ones that are gone. If somebody had stayed two months without checking on you, it doesn’t mean the person is gone. Sometimes people could just need a minute reciprocity to know we also care. And some other times, anyone could be having challenging times and deserves a check from the other end.
Secondly, in the circumstances surrounding their separation (Gen 13) Abraham demonstrated ‘love for peace’ as a prerequisite for a sustained relationship including the readiness to compromise and take a given side for peace to reign. This too highlights a very important contention in present day relationship matters. And this is about understanding the purpose of a relationship and knowing what to follow after the purpose is no more; knowing that every friend have come for a purpose And some purpose can be time bound.
Thirdly, Abraham reminds us of loyalty and going above and beyond for friends. – “When Abram heard that his relative had been taken captive, he called out the 318 trained men born in his household and went in pursuit as far as Dan. During the night Abram divided his men to attack them and he routed them, pursuing them as far as Hobah, north of Damascus. He recovered all the goods and brought back his relative Lot and his possessions, together with the women and the other people.” (NIV)(Gen 14:14-16.).
Here he displayed a love that is unconditional and a sense of responsibility for lots welfare. These are rare kind of friends who Whether you are up or down, right or wrong, they are into you. They are in it for the long haul. You get in trouble; they’ll get in trouble with you. They’ll come to see you in the jail house. They’ll come get you out of the crack house. You can open up and share anything with them.
we can learn A BETTER ETIQUETTE FOR CHRISTAIN RELATIONSHIP from these very acts of Father Abraham:
This are virtues we can pray for and when they are impacted into our heart by the spirit, we take an eminent positions in one another’s life.
Be the Abraham!
Make it work!
But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.
Many attempt to define virginity brings the above verse of the Bible to mind.
Others have also defined virginity around the hymen concept: like defining virginity as one who has not involved in vaginal-penis sexual activity.
These two approach to defining virginity is very extreme and despicable.
In the first extreme, it will be necessary to emphasize that virginity though a laudable virtue but on its own as a state of sexual purity does not connote a right standing with God.
A working definition of virginity here will render virginity as a STATE of MEMORY purity about SEXUAL ACTIVITIES. A good test on what should fall under sexual activities is its trail on the memory of the persons involved. This is why virginity is not holistically a spiritual state because even after you have repented and forgiven, the memories of moments of sexual activities continues to be there.
This fact addresses the first extreme in the definition of virginity as a state of the heart/spiritual purity. To be considered and excluded from the definition of virginity is the bodily and soulish aspect of man. Bodily, man is a physical, biological or physiological beings with instinctive hormonal meditated responses. In the soul aspect of man, man has a mind which is the oceans where the wind of thought blows to cause it’s wave of emotions. As long as man lives, the mind cannot cease to receive the winds of thought!
Having established this, it will be necessary to revisit the statement our Lord Jesus made in Mathew 5 above. Firstly, He was referring to adultery/sin; not virginity: a state of the memory. Thus, this verse should not be extended from adultery; specified, to virginity by any means whether inductive or deductive. That’s why it should be emphatic that virginity is only a virtue and not a state of right standing with God.
Secondly, He was speaking to the Jews; scribes and Pharisees who as we well know, were ardent adherents of the law of Moses, the Torah. I believe that our Lord Jesus making the statement above was intending to deny the Jews of any platform to stand and feed on their self righteous attitude but for all to acknowledge the hopeless state of man and acknowledge their need for a saviour as the only way they can fulfil the law which they so much love.
So to quote the above verse of the scripture would mean crossing out every one from the virginity status which is unobtainable. Every sexual lust that is not controlled would often graduate into pornography, masturbation, bestiality etc. Until then, it is not a sexual ACTIVITIES yet.
Also, it should be emphatic that virginity is not defined as one who has not lust/thought lustful-from the hallmark of the mind activities but defined as one who has not engaged(physically) in any sexual activities.
Albeit, am I endorsing dirty thoughts? NOP! Our thoughts is influenced by what we hear, see and do. The Bible enjoins us to renew our mind by reading the word of God(Rom12:2; Eph 4:28). This way, our mind is submerged in the spirit and our body too is stayed.
On the other extreme, virginity is not limited to presence or absence of hymen. Men don’t have hymen after all. The definition of virginity includes every sexual ACTIVITIES like; Masturbating alone or with a partner, oral, vaginal, and anal sex, kissing sexually, rubbing your bodies together in romance, bestiality etc. It includes every source of sexual satisfaction, acclamation, habit or addict. Many persons whose hymen is still intact(in the faces of other factors that can tear the hymen noted) could get a legal chastity of virginity but not a memory chastity. There’s no virginity in the absence of sexual chastity for virginity is a chastity belt: all things being equal.
Summarily, you are a virgin if you have not involved in any sexual activities. If you are not a virgin, this is not a condemnation but like our Lord Jesus said to the woman taken in adultery; go and sin no more! Lean on God through Jesus to overcome every sexual activities outside marriage.
I Love You😁
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Can a Christian say ‘l love you’ to a fellow believer?
Without the fear of being misunderstood or having his motives misinterpreted?
Many of my African friends may answer yes to these but taking it further-when last did you say ‘ l love you’ to someone?
Many classical African churches would answer NO and assert that you only say it to your wife or fiancee. This is typical of churches who prefer to play safe in their approach to teaching by adopting a conservative demeanour. There’s a questionable sides to such classical religious line of thought especially judging from the fact that these teachings most times is not what the student Christian do outside. So rather than pretend and run in hypocrisy it’s better to divulge every concept with the truth in simplicity.
Other persons may also say NO and explain ‘ l love you’ as a phrase that’s been heavily mumbled, wumbled and misused by the world. those in this school of thought decides to adopt the total abstinence approach. This is a hard attempt because we have the nature of God which is love, one cannot continue to suppress ones content, it will always want to have an expression. I would rather propose that Christians relearn what the Bible has about love, and instead of copying from the world should insist on the biblical injunction thereby salt the world on what love is.
Many African would also say NO in the spirit of Africanism. But this is all tendencies toward the status quo, not really love for African values per say. Our world is changing- sorry it have undergone series of changes. We would do better to analyze this changes with the Truth; the WORD, in simplicity and not by sticking to what we think even at the risk of pretends.
Love as a concept has been so much redefined. Some choose to approach the definition of love by splitting it into cadres; phileos, Eros, Storge, and Agape. Though I have my reservation about this approach because the Bible did not have such rendering-understandably the explanations are rooted in the Bible. The splitting should better be emphasized for the purpose of comprehension. Love is love, with all it’s component it functions as one entity. Trying to split love is like trying to split an individual into spirit, soul and body. Instead, a gold definition for love is no other but as outlined in 2Cor 13. Love conceptualized this way can be confessed, shared, and expressed to one another in the faith.
O yes! We must come out from the fear of misinterpretation. We live in a Small world; once it occurs to one, soon it will occur to all. All that is needed to address this fear is to create a state, a shared sense of understanding in one another in the what’s not and what love is. Such understanding could include;
1. ‘l love you’ is not a proposal, it does not mean am thinking futuristic of you.
2.’ I Love You’ could simply mean an expression of gratitude, pleasantries, goodwill, acceptance, value, greetings, etc to one another.
3. It is also not wholly an expression of the emotions or feelings. Love is spiritual and has an emotional and physical connotation. So ‘I LOVE YOU’ rather connotes that someone had successfully connected with you spiritually; had found purpose, fellowship, comradeliness, and more with you. Though emotions cannot be completely excised but it should not be the emphasis, and love too is not complete without the physical aspect-sacrifice.
4. Love is not a good feelings only-it is such feelings as the journey to the cross or 2 Cor13.
5. Love is not infatuation, lust, physical attraction or hormonal reactions to opposite sex.
6. Love is love, no more no less! You cannot say I love you with brotherly love (phileos) for instance. Trying to explain or tag your love expression would only bring more confusion-leave it simple: ‘I LOVE YOU’
7. Every one desires to be loved, no one would be offended when you say ‘I love you’. Rather it is the fulfilment of the gospel-love your neighbors as you love your self: hereby is all the law fulfilled (Gal5:14; Roms 13:10). ‘I love you’ would be a very effective way to exercise Eph 4:29:
Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.
‘I love you’ should thus be purposefully said, not given to flattering. When used in this faith it can bring peace to a troubled minds, if said to someone in pain, it can help relieve their pain, it can bring healing to the sick, it can bring edification to one in depression, it can bring sense of value to one feeling inferior, hope to one in despair, especially depending on who is saying it, it brings the giver and the receiver to a level of spiritual, emotional and physical pal.
8. ‘ I love you’ is an antidote that should be shared without reservation, good for the goose and gander. It’s expression should be shared from the grassroots; from the grandparents to the parents to the siblings to the friends to the partners to the strangers and to all.
9. ‘I love you’ should not be controversial, it is necessary to be informed about the level of understanding and sense of reasoning between the two parties and to first build a mutual understanding on the what’s and what’s not of love. If you want to experiment it, you could start by saying it to parents and siblings and you would see how it feels and be more comfortable when you say it outside.
Happy New Year#
I Love You!
Covenant friends plays a helpful role in the journey process into the success destinations of ones life purpose. This they do by giving sound counsel, accountability with feedback of their growth works. Oftentimes, they are lifelong friends who relates with honesty as a hallmark and would tell the truth irrespective of whose ox was gored. They are no praise singers nor lover of of sentiments, rather they love for the content of their character.
You need this kind of friends for 2019